The next few blogs are postings I forgot I had on my "Lame-space" page. I started this series a few years ago but kind of lost steam after a few postings. It was during my "comic book" phase, so bear with me! Let me know if I should continue with it....
By day, Amie Cash is just a normal, fun-loving gal. She helps her family battle the everyday struggles. When her friends think about doing anything insane or harebrained, she works as a negotiator and talks them out of their plans. You may even see her while she is out on the town assisting little old ladies across the street, as well as giving out loose change to your local street bums. As she shuttles to her thankless job where she checks fine business men and women into the hotel, she always seems happy and willing to make your day the best. When Amie's long and droning shift comes to an end, she hears a small voice crying for help. With immediate urgency, Amie flashes to the ladies room. In one amazing zip, she exits as "The Caped First Dater"!!! Almost falling over, the women in the restroom see a vivid flash of pink, turquoise and lavender (with a hint of chocolate brown), and they are immediately relieved that help is on the way! As our Caped friend travels at the speed of light, she reaches her destination. Still hearing the victims' plea, she bursts through the door and exclaims "Have no fear, your Caped First Dater is here!!!" With a sigh of relief, the lonely, desperate (and slightly retarded) man is overcome with joy! "Caped First Dater, I am SO excited you are here! I have been waiting forever for you to walk into my life. You are the epitome of beauty! Will you marry me???" The lovely yet distraught superhero ignores the poor mans' request and continues on her quest of yet another morbid and unearthly date. She listens to the mans' tale of a lonely and sad life, waiting for a woman such a herself to grace him with her presence. The Caped First Dater is all but polite when he reaches in his pocket and pulls out $1.75 for the bar tab. She waives her hand at his meager change and tells him "No, it is my pleasure to pay for this. After all, I am the CAPED FIRST DATER!" Simply overwhelmed, the sad excuse of a man leans in to kiss our superhero. The First Dater politely turns her cheek and he plants a very wet and inappropriate kiss on her face. As they walk out of the tavern together, he attempts to pull her aside so he can use inappropriate behavior. In one swift movement, she sends the loser plummeting to the concrete. With one foot firmly planted on his chest and both her hands on her hips, she proclaims "As the Caped First Dater, I DO NOT put out on the first date!!! You sir, need to be punished!!!" For one brief moment, he flashes her an evil smile thinking that he will be punished in a very good way. She grasps him firmly by his arm and they both rocket into the dark sky. He starts wailing out in agony, for the forceful tug on his arm had dislocated his shoulder, he then blacks out from the pain. A short while later, the horny and disturbed man wakes up finding himself lying on the floor of a small, dirty bar. He is surrounded by many biker men looking at him with desire. He stands up and looks at himself in the mirror on the wall, he is now wearing a short red pleather skirt and a sequined tub top with red platform heels. As the door closes behind our hero, she hears a high-pitch, feminine cry for help. Very pleased with herself, the Caped First Dater flys off into the sunrise, wondering what the next night of dating will bring her....
What will The Caped First Dater encounter next week? S & M Man? Super Tranny? Or is it going to be the infamous Mr. Curious???
Stay tuned for the Adventures of
THE CAPED FIRST DATER!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment