Another posting from the Caped First Dater series. Funny and true!
Well boys and girls... It's that time again to visit the world of everyone's favorite Caped Dater. Last we left her, she victoriously thwarted yet another loser and forever he will stay away from any woman wanting a "normal" relationship. Innocent women everywhere are rejoicing at The Caped First Dater's efforts.
In a few short weeks Amie is reminded of the 3rd year anniversary of a night spent with her long time crush. She ran into him in a local bar after not seeing him for many years. The moment they saw each other, there were fireworks. Everyone else in the bar simply vanished, they were completely alone to be reunited at long last. Flashes of laughter and joy are a frequent reminder of that night. She reminisces when he told her that he always wanted to be with her but never wanted to damage their friendship. And when he told her that he didn't want to loose her again, she was forever elated. Amie knew that this was it. He was the one. She could call off the man hunt for her "Mr. Perfect". The next day, she waited for his call that he had promised her. No call. Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months. Nothing. No sign that he even existed. She even started to think that her mind was playing tricks on her. Amie knew better. She knew that he was just another douche bag waiting to use her and toss her aside waiting for his next victim. Amie chalked it up and continued her life as if nothing happened.
3 long years later, Amie and a few close friends decide to go for a Girls-Night-Out. The drinks were flowing and the dancing was exhausting. As the girls were getting ready to leave in order to find another scene to paint, in walks the alleged "Mr. Not-So-Perfect". At first, Amie thought it was a mirage. As her friend shook her to gain her attention, Amie knew it was the real thing. Amie knew that there was no time for her emotions to get in the way. He had to be stopped before another unknowing and virtuous girl was hurt by this monster. Something had to be done. In a New York minute, she zipped toward the ladies room and exited as THE CAPED FIRST DATER!
With a turquoise, pink and lavender blur, our heroine suddenly appears standing next to Mr. Not-So-Perfect. Her cunning smile and radiant hair in place, she makes a move. She nods to the bartender requesting drinks, and in an instant two beers materialize in front them. Obviously impressed, Mr. Not-So-Perfect strikes up a conversation. He talks about the weather, the downfall of today's economy, his latest business endeavor and anything remotely boring and uninteresting. All the while she smiles and gives him her undivided attention. As the bartender announces last call, he whispers in her ear "Let's get out of here and do something bad." She flashes him a smile and follows him outside. He then leads her to a dark alleyway and he proceeds to grope her. She pushes him back and with her fists of concrete she punches him square in the nose. For what seemed like hours, he was bent over covering his nose to prevent any more blood loss. When he rose up, he screamed "What the hell was that?!?" Trying to hold her emotions close, she exclaimed "That's for breaking her heart not only once but twice. You will never hurt her again!" Like a lightning bolt, she flew off wiping the tears from her face.
Mr. Not-So-Perfect is the sole reason The Caped First Dater came into existence. She swoops in day in and day out, saving women from making dire mistakes. Women need someone to teach men like this lessons in how to treat them. They are not something you can discard like the daily newspaper. The Caped Dater is a marvel among women. Without her, women would never rise from the pain men put them through. This is the reason she must go on fighting crimes done against women.
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